Movie Review: Jersey Shore Shark Attack

Synopsis: Jersey Shore Shark Attack unfolds during the July Fourth weekend at – where else? — the Jersey Shore, where rare swarms of sharks are converging due to illegal underwater drilling. Now the angry sharks are on a rampage, devouring residents, and leaving it up to the locals to try and save the day.

When I first heard of this I thought how great it would be to see those annoying Jersey Shore folks munched on by killer sharks. I could really see the potential. Sadly, the annoying people are actual the HEROES here. I kid you not. *sigh*

This is a total parody of The Jersey Shore TV show with lead characters that are complete caricatures of them, right down to names like Nooki, Paulie, J-Moni and The Complication. Now take that awful show and add scenes from Jaws, then throw in a bit of the recent Piranha remake... and you have this tongue-in-cheek abomination. 

The sharks make some appearances between listening to the Guidos argue and complain, and you'll wish they didn't once you see them. The sharks look so incredibly fake you'd think some 12-year-old made them on his computer. And somehow they can grab people off of boat decks and even take a guy right off a stage that didn't even appear to be close to the water. It's hilarious actually. As usual with SyFy channel films, every scene like this causes massive (and ridiculous) blood spray.

Pluses? Joey Fatone makes a cameo and gets turned into shark chum, so that's pretty cool. The lades are pretty hot and there are a lot of bikinis. The parodies of the Jersey Shore cast was actually fun it rips on the Italian-American stereotype to no end.

I'll say this film is very self-aware of it's total sucktitude and that does make it pretty fun. If you like the "so-good-it's-bad" sort of thing you may love this. Personally I think with better effects and a higher body count which includes all the Guidos, plus some R-rated style skin shown, it might have been a classic.


2/10